#6 Reflections: A Book That Changed Much

Writing has always been my fear but there are so many words inside of me, waiting for a page to fall on. So this is my attempt to push past this fear — a reflection a day in writing.

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What’s a book that changed your life? A dramatic question without a doubt. A question I would have struggled to answer in the past. Yet if asked today, I wouldn’t hesitate for a second.

The Lightless Sky by Gulwali Passarlay.

It’s an interesting book to pick as life-changing. It’s not a self help book, an Islamic reminder, or even an academic piece of work. In fact, it’s a memoir. About the 12 month journey of a 12 year old refugee from Afghanistan to the UK, and about his life thereafter. Yet I know for a fact that this book played a pivotal role in my own journey of life; of seeking clarity and purpose.

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17/06/2021 Wednesday

As I turned over the last pages, I placed my head on the cover of the book, closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. In. Out. How does a book that I’ve already read, a story that I know so well, still leave me so affected.

My eyes remain closed as my mind wanders back in time to when I first turned over the last pages of this story. I was a sobbing mess, exploding with all emotions. From feelings of pain and anguish for the 12 year old whose childhood had been stripped from him on a journey he was forced to take. To awe by his will to grow and thrive from his experiences and give back to a country that didn’t accept him easily.

However, alongside all this, there was one other distinct emotion I remember experiencing that night- shock.

Shock at how oblivious I was to the atrocities happening right at my doorstep: I knew of wars ravaging the Middle East, of poverty ravaging West Africa, of dictatorships, genocide and everything else in between...all happening across the world. Yet the illegal deportations, the police brutality and the inhumane conditions of the refugee camps right here, in the richest most prosperous countries of the world, remained completely unknown to me for years.

Shock at how influenced I was by media rhetoric although I though that would never be me: being Muslim in the West meant growing up being aware of media bias. We knew not to rely on the media alone for facts, to critically analyse terminology and tone. Yet while all these skills were rigorously applied to news at home, they weren’t applied as much to news from abroad. The media was the main fact source and so unintentionally, I had biases.

Shock at what a privileged life I lived: a life that allowed me to stay blissfully blind for so many years.

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Reading this spurred me to begin a new chapter. I realised I was living life passively, concerned with nothing past my own bubble. I realised that doing well in school was not enough, there was so little I knew. I was for sure feeling more overwhelmed than ever, but I left that book knowing I wanted to learn more, do more, be more.

So, do I think this book will be life-changing to all? Maybe. Maybe not. All I know is for me, this book came at a perfect time. In retrospect, this book was the last jigsaw puzzle to all the other small happenings and events that were taking place at the same time. It became the catalyst for internal change.

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